OVERCOMING SLEEP STRUGGLES STEMMING FROM CHILDHOOD TRAUMA

A friend once shared a nasty childhood experience that left me reeling. His father had flogged him mercilessly in his sleep for a previous "offence". A childish delinquent solecism that could be remedied over gentle talks led to a brutal hiding while he slept. I shivered profusely as he narrated his ordeal. Through it all, his subconscious froze in space while his brain exploded with terror. Not being aware of what was coming especially in a vulnerable state of sleep is a colossal abuse. This awful experience in my friend's childhood left him with a sleep terrors and permanent nocturnal frights.

He doesn't sleep well.

I have had to deal with sleep anxiety myself. Not from being beaten in my sleep but being awakened for thrashings. My mother would address a previous mistake by waking me up in the middle of the night where there was no escape than to pay for my prior "disobedience" in the most gruesome way. It was a traumatizing experience. The resultant damage is the ability to sleep properly without anxiety, panic or tension. 

Adults with unresolved childhood trauma do encounter difficulty in relaxing the body during the REM stage of their sleep for cell repairs and wellness optimisation. This has a negative effect on the quality of one’s life. But it can be remedy in a DIY medication free-context.

How can this be done? 

Try magical healing game called in THE CIRCLE OF SAFETY. Play the circle of safetygame tonight. Give your outer adult the permission to calm your inner child by telling her/him/they a magical tale. . Make it a tale by the moonlight in a campfire setting. Imagine you are sitting around the fire in a remote, peaceful and verdant African village, where the cooing of the night is whispering a calming breeze to your heart. And the glowing yellow-orange embers, winking fluffy love at you. The tale-night circle has Moana your best friend holding your hand with other happy children sharing your joy. It is a total bliss for you in this setting. You are all eagerly listening to the soothing voice of your ancestral-guide (give it a name that resonate with your totem) telling you the most enchanted story you have ever heard. You are the epicentre of that story. YYou are uplifted, celebrated, loved, protected and your innards dances ecstatically.

  

Visualize this elevated and joyful story that you have created and getting told by your ancestral-spirit, which always end with you falling soundly asleep in the circle of loving gazes and caressing hands putting a sheet over you, resting your head in a pillow and massaging your feet gently with whistling lullaby permeating the air.

Repeat this exercise for twenty-one nights at bed bedtime.

Be totally free to explore the depth of your creative imagination for a tale in a setting that works for you. This is just a prototype. It does not have to be followed religiously. You are an incredible force in the universe. You are a creator, create your healing. Let your outer adult tell you inner baby; “come, come to healing in the circle of safety child. Sleep, sleep child, you are home and safe”.

#AfrolickAffectiveHealing

Toyin Ajao (PhD)

Writer, Healer & Wellness Scholar.